Thanksgiving: My least Favorite Meat Holiday

I have an unpopular opinion. I don’t love turkey. It’s just not my jam. And forced family fun always adds pressure to an already intense time of year. On the other hand, I do love a three day work week followed by down time at home with my family. No added pressure just movies, Christmas trees, and fluffy blankets.

I could totally skip from Halloween to Christmas every year although everyone around me insists I do all the things. Eat the turkey, the stuffing, and the weird cranberry jello thing (literally the worst), while watching sports. I like Christmas. No turkey, just ham and twinkle lights. We all know ham is only second to lamb at Easter. I said what I said.

Thanksgiving is not an easy holiday for everyone. All week I have given what my husband calls the “holiday pep talk” to clients, friends, and family. I have even been on the receiving end of some of those pep talks from my friends too. Did I mention I love twinkle lights? I surround myself with the satisfying glow of Christmas lights, I find it gives a much needed dopamine bump.

For people who have lost, Thanksgiving is a tough holiday. It’s usually the first of many holidays without their loved one. Whether it’s due to death, divorce, or unexpected family change…it’s tough. Check on the people in your life who have lost, a simple text will go a long way.

For people with blended families, the planning for any holiday event is unreal. Where do we eat this year? What do we bring? How many Thanksgiving meals do we have to attend? Have I mentioned that I don’t like turkey? Give people with blended families the gift of flexibility and acceptance; can’t make it this year, that’s okay.

For people who are lonely, the idealized family commercials alone are tough. The social media frenzy showing all the holiday events that you are not invited to can lead to FOMO and self doubt. Invite someone to a meal that may be lonely, there is enough turkey to share…they can have my portion. I am only here for the sweet potatoes with marshmallows anyway.

For people with mental health or substance abuse issues, it’s a time of high anxiety. What triggers will be present? Food, alcohol, family members? Don’t push anything on anyone. What they take in on Thanksgiving is their call. Offer support, sit on the porch, or physical affection when needed. A good hug goes a long way.

For people with kids, magnify all of these things by 100. Add in food refusal and over stimulation and you really have a party.

So here is the thing, Thanksgiving is suppose to be a day to be thankful. But choosing to be thankful has nothing to do with turkey or even weird casseroles. People who are able to be thankful can find contentment in the toughest of situations, that's resilience. And that is a desirable skill.

So instead of disliking turkey or being consumed with things you don’t have, learn to enjoy the present. Enjoy the smaller things that are not stressful. Sandwich the tougher events with lots of self care and lighter events that are less intense. Say no when needed or set time limits when possible. And add in twinkle lights.

Try to understand that we all have different experiences and perceptions of what is undesirable for the holiday season. Be compassionate and understanding of others if your experiences differ. Some people really like turkey and that’s great too!